The last couple days of CPM training were pretty intense as we had to draw up our own "Master Plan" based on CPM principles and present it to the whole group. So, I didn't blog the last couple days. But now we're finished. I presented my plan and had a very good response from those who listened. I hope they will pray for me and the work here in The Location.
What did I get from the training?
Besides a library of information and concepts to consider...
God really planned to have me here. There were about four major things that should have kept me from even attending in the first place. I can't go into all of them on here, but one of them was the fact that I had missed the deadline and all the slots were full. Still, one man in my agency kept praying and just a week before the training a spot opened up. I didn't really want to go at such a late date and so many responsibilities where I am at, but after talking with my wife we concluded that God must want me there. And now I can see way.
I have felt more like quitting the mission field in 2009 than I ever have since I came to work here nearly a decade ago. We have been hit with problem after problem after problem, and indeed were hit with yet another major problem just this past week. Yet, in the midst of all of this, God also did a miracle--our paperwork for an important enterprise here was approved last week after waiting for over three years. When I told some of our faithful supporters who had been praying for this for three years--they cried.
I feel that my heart has gotten off track in a lot of ways and this training helped me to get it back on track. I certainly have a much clearer focus on the mission that lies ahead. Along with that, I have regained a passion that I must have lost along the way. I have been pretty depressed at times feeling like I am not making any difference, that I'm wasting time, money and resources, and that I do not have what it takes to be an effective missionary. I have become stressed over too many things to do and little help to get it all done.
Mostly, I am convicted to pray, stay focused, believe that God WILL act and work through me, and obey him in everything. It is God who sustains us and empowers us.